Everybody loves kids – especially if you went through that phase of 9 months just to give birth to a human being, who would complicate matters even more after they were born. Have you ever thought that it was probably a Mistake to have kids? Come on, be honest, I know you have, because, well… I have had that thought “twice” as many times. But Kid you not, I was so consumed by the idea that I thought I must write about it. So here are 6 Reasons why one shouldn’t have kids! Fasten your seat belts, laughter riot coming up!!
They shit in their pants, they eat their boogers, and they don’t mind nibbling on the fruit they just peed on. Thats an actual life with kids. Before being a parent, you would never touch even a dirty spoon left by someone else. After being a parent, I’m not surprised if you tell me you scratched your face while holding poo in it, that was loitering around on the floor. You have also, most definitely, asked yourself, if it was poo or something else??
No, I’m not laughing.
Image: Giphy
I was never much of a crier as a person. If I just had to, I’d do that in solidarity, gently wetting the pillow, lying like an insomniac. But kids?????????
They howl as if the world is coming to an end. I read somewhere that cries of children are designed to be shrill so that their cries are not ignored and they are tended to immediately.
Like really, Mother Nature? Really?? They are hungry, they cry, they want to be picked, they cry, they hurt themselves, they cry. Whatever happened to your ability to be creative with baby functions??
Source: Gif Finder
Kids are dumb, like reeaallllly dumb! I mean I have no clue how you could put your finger in an open socket and laugh on the tiny electric shot you got, whereas howling your lungs out because Daddy got you a toy monkey? how can you pour pasta in your hair and eat shoes instead??
source: Make a Gif
Source: Tenor
I can swear they have some hidden sense of destruction. The moment you lie down to sleep, they will wake up. The minute you are beginning to do some hanky panky, they will wake up. The moment you think you can finally get to check your phone, they wake up. Dude, you slept literally like 7 seconds ago, HOW CAN YOU WAKE UP SO SOON??
source: Giphy
If you’ve breastfed your child, you know what I mean. Like hello, the cake is going to stay just where it is for as long as I’m alive. Don’t plot on taking it along with you wherever you go! Besides, it is mine. So deal with that!
source:Tenor
Oh, you should see how they pretend to be all cute and sweet. Every time you are pissed at them, wondering how miserable they’ve been making our lives, they will do something new and have you engaged in them. They will throw in a one-toothed smile, or just turn over like an Olympic gymnast, or coo a song that will just make you a big warm ball of mush. God knows how they do it, but they make YOU feel grateful for having them in your life. It’s a trick, seriously!!
source: Giphy
No Matter what they do, one thing I bluffed about, was that they are a Mistake. In reality, they are one of our biggest blessings. They have the ability to turn even the most frustrating day into a heavenly abyss.
Source: Giphy
Hey, they just used #6 on me Again!!!!!!!!!!!
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